We all have a story

We all have a story.

I feel like I owe it to you to fill you in on my past two years to explain the present.  Or for that matter to fill you in on the last decade, because I can’t have this story that is unfolding without the one that brought me to this threshold of the current.  All of which has transformed me, changed me.  But for today’s purpose I will start with the present.

And like a good conversation the past will find its way into my story.

At this present moment I find myself envisioning a room that I will work in.  I see how the lighting will be, the color of the fabrics, the layout of the room. But more then just the physical room I see it's purpose.

I have been stuck, stuck in routine, stuck in roles, stuck in my lack of wonder.  And these last two years have been . . . . . .long pause . . . . .Hard . . . . . the only word I could come up with.  

But the feeling I feel for these last two years, these hard years, is a stillness, is a reverence, there is a deep quite in me, emotions are waiting to be given permission to move, there is a burning in my heart, an excitement because even though these past two years have been years of fear and grief they have exposed a deep innate desire to LIVE. 

To not settle, to not put limits on myself, to not put limits on my observation of this universe.

I have a few mantras that I have been breathing in:

"Why not you"?   &  "You are More"!   

It is these simple phrases that started the ripple of shifting and change. 

Change seems to be the lead character of my story. 

I feel a fight of the old and new contending for space.  The shifting of thoughts and beliefs. There is a vibration and an excitement for what lies ahead. 

I only have fragments of words and images that have yet to be placed on their pages. 

In what order they land . . . 

Well, that is the wonder of the story!   

Nikki